A Nightmare (Closed to Robert.)

[sweetandripe]

"I love you, I'm so proud of you" Virginia said, smiling at her daughter and dropping her hand to her daughter's brown hair. Smiling, she ushered her along to go play with the others and watches as they all ran along the beach together. Corry, her bright star, taking her youngest sister's hand and smiling as they played together even as the blood covered her daughter's hands. The stain spreading from one to the other. "Corry... Corry, let go of her."

Her voice raised in panic even as she ran towards her children, watching as one by one they stumbled and fell into the sand. Her living daughter, her bright star, clutching the tiny hand of her daughter as she stumbled too and pulled Corry with her. She had been so small, she'd barely drawn breath when she was taken too. Virginia stumbled, reaching for Corry as she too began to struggle to breath, to live.

"No, no, no, not you too. No, Corry breathe. Breathe for me, please- please-" Virginia began watching her daughter's face turn pale, and cold, and-


She woke crying, gasping for breath before she covered her tear stained face with her hands. Shoulders shaking, she drew in breath loudly as she tried to regain control over herself. But the tears wouldn't stop, she kept seeing her every time she closed her eyes. Red hair tangled in her hands, pale and lifeless just like the others buried in her garden. She couldn't go through that again, she couldn't bury another child.

"I can't- not again," Virginia mumbled, disorientated and grief stricken until she felt something- someone stir beside her. Robert, Robert was home and she couldn't- she couldn't cry when he was here. He couldn't see her like this. Burying her face in her hands, she turned away from him and hid her face. "Go back to sleep."

Comments

[scaledtokill]

"Did you tell her exactly why you were calling?" Robert asked. He imagined that if Virginia had called to say she had a nightmare and was scared or upset, Corry might react differently. If Virginia actually allowed herself to be humanized it might go a long way toward connecting with their daughter. "Because you present yourself as perfect and everyone else needing to be perfect. She doesn't want to connect with that. She wants to connect with a real person."

Even then it would probably be hard. There was years and years of distance and resentment between the two and that wouldn't be repaired overnight. It would probably take years and- ideally- therapy that probably neither woman would be willing to do.

"You did the best you could with Corry," he said. When they were younger they talked about having a big family. Only Robert being away so often and constant cheating had killed that. "I didn't leave you in an easy position and despite what Corry does or doesn't remember you made sure she was very happy for a long time."

[sweetandripe]

"No, I tried. She didn't let me get that far," Virginia murmured, tracing her fingertips down his chest. Her fingers sliding over ribs before she brought him closer, sighing sadly as if trying to contain the overwhelming despair she felt at her daughter pushing her further away. "She doesn't want to connect with me at all. I'm the villain in her tales darling, I made my bed with her. She doesn't want... me. All she ever wanted was her father. I was always the bad guy."

He would never know how her daughter's face would be sullen with her one moment and then light up when she thought her father was home. He was always the one she ran to when she was upset or hurt, no matter how hard she tried.

"I didn't, not always. I couldn't, it was too hard." Virginia murmured. Trying to remain in control when another pregnancy test came back negative, and she had had to take Corrine to school. Bright, happy Corry who had no idea how terrified and miserable she was. How lonely she was without her husband there. "I just want her safe. I always have."

[scaledtokill]

"You just have to keep trying. She'll come around some day. She'll realize you were doing the best you had with the bad situation I put you in," he said. It would likely take both of them to come around but Robert was confident that it would happen. His wife was so accepting of him and Corry was starting to trust him more... surely both women could eventually get along with each other?

"And no one, no parent, makes their child happy all the time. They'd be a terrible parent if they did," he continued to reassure her, running his fingers through his damp hair. It hurt to hear her think this about herself because he knew that she tried her best. "You did well. I want you to know I think that."

[sweetandripe]

"It wasn't you, it would've happened I'm sure if you were here." Virginia murmured. But maybe it wouldn't have if he had stayed with her. It would've been harder to hide each pregnancy from her husband. Perhaps things would have been different but she couldn't change what had happened. Even if she wanted to sometimes. "Then I'm a terrible parent, I just want her to be happy."

Looking up at her husband, she took a breath the words and secrets almost on her lips as she murmured his name softly.

"Robert... I... I love you." Virginig murmured, tightening her hold on him. She couldn't tell him, he'd hate her. She didn't know if she could forgive herself after all.

[scaledtokill]

"You are not a terrible parent. She just can't see or appreciate the lessons you tried to teach her," Robert said. Even if they hadn't all been the right lessons he knew that his wife's heart had been in the right place. How Corry could ever doubt that Virginia loved her he couldn't understand. Virginia loved their daughter so much it hurt her.

"And I love you too. I loved being here with you in bed. Having you close. I always missed it but never understood how much until I was back here."